If late, I finally understand why

 That night, the first time I smoked a ¯¯¯¯¯¯ lit his first cigarette, so that unpleasant smoke smoked again and again into my sensitive nose. Heart in the fight wearing a very difficult subject. Ashes to Ashes, the eyes red .... point second cigarette, there is no hesitation about deeply puff .... hard to smell smoke, is also choking, coughing and choking me until the tears so slip off ..... he said, when you buy from the pet, I begin to understand, the original of all for him, than I am important! that moment my heart became very cold ... very light .... I had strong views, as he sat down and would not talk to me, will not look me, I will not laugh, but he will smile back at me lying in front of dumping dollars lying on the lying self- words to himself. without even looking at me lying on the front smoking, drinking coke in front lying. I sat beside him looking like a fool with no understanding of lying and smoking his second-hand smoke. I try to know yourself existence, occasionally asking his questions, not answer that he is not speaking I'm bored, I really did not addiction! I asked myself why, but back to their own lives, to walk along the streets during the day and night to sing K? I could do ! Why go on Saturday at his, ever do to him playing computer games, make him think I'm sick? why he left out than to chance him to me? end of five when he focused on picking Dragon Boat World Cup when he focused on watching the World Cup high season, when he focused on work. I said: I do not care ah, over the season, you take the time with me still me! he said: Oh! He gave me that commitment. I thought he was a trustworthy person, yes, he certainly can do it! but the original is my wishful ... ... now he wants to buy the pet, proof of lying is really important to him . I know I will not expect this one will have to accompany me to do, that he did not need me ... .. I felt like I was his before the week of 2 / 7, but now I know 2 / 70 positions are No! He said the moment to buy pets, I finally understand ... .... I feel very bad ... ... but still with a look through my purse, the strong support that play with him to withdraw the money. because I feel that if I really want to do something, I would hope that the other half will support me. So I choked back, I do not want bad at the time of his Masaoki! But when he closed the rear door and told me not to go, I know I really angry, wronged! ripped a long time did not touch a package of coffee, lit a cigarette ... ... ... simmering mind a thought: is not born, not born, and tomorrow go to hair and continue to drink my coffee, of my makeup, no longer care about any of his things. let you all back to their own lives, when we think we can afford to live with the responsibility of the time, and then to BB good. Otherwise, we all know are uneven, we are not living better. not like other people to smoke, do not like the smell of secondhand smoke. The first time he smoked in the room when I wanted him to say: If I eat in the house every evening ripe durian, what would you feel? but I did not say, I understand that a person quit smoking so hard, but let him know that he has no ability to do something for me, just hope he do not do too much, do not let me breathe in too much! I do not want to force him to do reluctant to do, so I force myself! was planning to get married, I said the words of BB fewer students smoke, do not drink cola. There was a time he really cut down, and did not drink cola, and I'm so happy, happy because he is willing to sacrifice our future for the BB. so I quit all of the physical impact of habit: I fear the residual caffeine, so quit the favorite drink of coffee every day, do not drink cola, less to go there where second-hand smoke. fear of chemical residues, ring cosmetics, hair ring, ring electric hair. read a lot of online information folic acid tablets to eat every day ... ... ... But in fact, that a drama has been only one person is doing, he even spectators are not making life difficult for him to go along with it! he came back, I stay in Taiwan, before the brain a little bit at a loss, smoking is not dying ... I heard other voices, I was just glad that they are not pajamas lying in bed ... .... Originally, I wanted to cheer up, to share his joy, but I'm sorry, I really can not! I can only put a calm, though not care, but are concerned about him pet a few words. to the bottles usually do not want him to drink cola. I can do, only these! I know he is happy, I do not fit even, but should not be angry, this is the most two people respect at least, although I was very upset, but can not sweep other people's Xing! then he has been playing, I want to call myself the last chat with him and let him talk about his joy, but I still did not move against TV , because I was afraid he saw my tears, but was afraid he did not intend to share with me. Every time the tears to flow, I do not like to drink a cola drink, so Coke to push back the tears. do not know their What sort of existence? they wanted to do did not stay by me, I think I do not need to accompany that person to accompany and wanted to leave at dawn, but that made too obvious, why hurt feelings? that I did not sleep long nights, not because the coffee, because ... ... .. In fact, we have not yet suitable to live with it! or too much for two years, so we can give up a little space, allowing the spirit of both sides into their space, only live together, go to a BB now! your door open, but the door was shut, and I still can only stand at the door, only to send the Hedge. One can not let me rain shelter where only a hotel, not home. That night, I made this dream several times: when I was changing clothes in his room when a strange man hit another in, when I screamed When her husband no one there ... ... ... .. I just want one and I have a business volume of people living with me ever after, I just want people to do when I was a wild time D, the fruit will not use personal vision to look down on my mind refused to .25 what birthday wish I could be, but can not stand the wronged! outsiders can not see my tears, even if there is only flow to the heart. He asked me: Why did you apt to tears? I said to myself: Because you make me pity!